In Memory of My Father

Eulogy for My Father, Henry G. Klinges Jr. M.D.  9-12-21 to 2-2-83

(The following is the eulogy I delivered at the conclusion of my dad's funeral Mass at Saint Timothy's Roman Catholic Church on February 5, 1983.)

My mother and the rest of the family just wanted to take a few moments to say a few things in honor of my dad. No amount of words can possibly express the love we feel toward him, of course, but we feel that a little ought to be said. Last night we were all at home and decided that it would be nice to relate some of the special things he said, did, and meant to us.

My mother and father were great lovers, and after thirty-four years of marriage were still deeply romantic about their love for each other. Together they endured all the tests that life brings, and grew more deeply in love with each one. What they felt for each other sustained and supported them. They were also each other's best and dearest friend. My sister, Joanne, remembers when she was engaged to my brother-in law that my dad told her that even if the world were destroyed so that nothing was left, as long as he had my mom he wouldn't mind, and was sure that things would work out just fine. As long as they had each other nothing else mattered.

My mom told us that love, goodness, honor, and decency was alive and real in their two hearts; hearts so intricately interwoven that they were truly one. Indeed, these two in the beauty of their love fulfilled the mystery of marriage that "the two shall be one." In the fullness of their love they conceived and raised a family of five children, nurturing us in their love.

As they gave entirely of themselves to each other, so they gave entirely of themselves to us in order that we could have better lives. Theirs, and our, biggest joys came from doing things as a family. My dad would say, "Lets all decide where we're going on vacation this year.", or "Let's all take a ride somewhere today." Or, "Let's all go to a movie, or out to dinner." My dad liked to have us all together. It was a comfort to him, and to all of us too, from the time we were little children when we would all play together with him on the floor, to the time a few days ago when we were all together with him, seeing him to his rest.

I am sorry that I can't fully express all the wonderful things he was to my mom, and how very much they loved and respected each other. And I'm sorry that there isn't enough time to say for Mark, Lisa, Greg, Joanne and myself what he meant to us as our daddy. And surely his granddaughters, Regina and Setareh want you to know how their Pop-Pop loved them and played with them; with a sweetness that made it seem as if he were a child again too.

We know that he loved us all very much. "Greater love than this hath no man, that he lay down his life for his friends." He laid down his life each day for all of us, and each of us had a share in what he sacrificed of himself. He gave constantly, completely, and generously of himself, allowing us to experience a sense of the goodness that can be in man. Indeed the proof of the fact that he gave his all to us is in the overwhelming sense of loss we feel now that the mercy of the Lord prevents him from doing more -- at least in terms of this mortal life, since we can't help but believe that he will continue to love and assist us from his place in eternity.

Because he was a man, he was not perfect. But love covers a multitude of sins, so surely we know that among men he was more perfect than others. (Actually, my brothers, sisters and myself feel that at the moment he was taken from us he had managed to attain perfection, and having nothing left to do here, he went to the place where perfection deserves to be.) We know that he was a good man because he bore good fruit; fruit grown by living virtuously and walking in righteousness by the grace of God.

We could each go on and on praising his virtues, because whatever good can be said of man can probably be said of this man. He respected life, and enjoyed it. He had a sense of humor. He was gentle, and had an overwhelming ability to forgive again and again. He was absolutely selfless, denying himself for the benefit of others. He was charitable, compassionate, kind and generous. He was humble, and clean-minded. He had immense integrity, and the ability to truly love.

He loved God above all. Indeed, it was this love of God, and obedience to his commandments, that enabled all of his virtues to be manifested. Surely he is blessed because he exhibited all of the virtues the Lord hailed in the Beatitudes.

I wish there were more time to praise him as he truly deserves. It is enough, however, that we all feel in our hearts this instant that which would take much time to say. We are happy to have known such a good, good man. We are grateful that God made him; helped him to become the man he was; and can now give him the rewards for his goodness that we could never give him despite our gratitude and love for him.

Now as we see him off on the latest adventure in his eternal life, let us consider that these need not be our last respects. We can pay him continual respect: first, by remembering to thank God that we had him for awhile; and second, by remembering to imitate his example. If we emulate his example of love of God, and love of family; if we learn to live up to the roles we have to play in life as he always lived up to the roles he played; if we follow his example of living a good life, we will truly show our respect, and come to the same good end.

Dear God, beginning with my mother with whom his life was so intertwined, and who loved him so much; and all of us his children and grandchildren to whom he gave so much of himself; and his sisters, and colleagues, and friends; all of us here thank You for this man.

And Dad, mom and all the rest of us, your loving family, thank you for good times, our good name, and the example we'll always have from you of how to lead a good life. We love you, and know you will always be nearby. We look forward to the day when, by the mercy of God, we all will see you again.

Lord, have mercy on us all.